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Songs of fear and despair

by M dot Strange

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1.
Not Alive 05:18
I forgot why I was alive I'm nothing now except afraid to die But why do I live if life has nothing else to give but fear Is the end near? Afraid to live afraid to die Just tell me what to do talking heads and I will do it- Crazy as fuck yes I will pursue it Why me its grimy why me bad timing why me its crime gee Why me I'm blind why me I'm finding everything combining inside of me Eveything is rhyming with bad words everything I feel goes unheard or felt feel like I'm gonna melt down and go down the drain round and round I'm afraid of whats down there- Will they strap me to a chair? I don't care anymore- yeah muthafuckas lets go to war--- Everything is blinding me Everything bad is finding me down Everything is winding me up Everything is filling my cup with fire Everything wants to destroy my desire to go forward Sit there forever and die and only say these 4 words I am not alive I am not alive I am not alive I am not alive I forgot why I was alive I'm nothing now except afraid to die But why do I live if life has nothing else to give but fear Is the end near? he sighed and said I died inside she sighed and said I'm already dead He laughed and said I won't wear the mask She laughed and said dead people can't complete these tasks All of a sudden all these corrupt muthafuckas with bleached white teeth and cool hair They care about me now nice its not a dream its a nightmare One morning I woke up and I was dead Not alive is what it said inside my broken head Stood up and fell down because now I lay upon the ground ground Grind me up and bury me with smoke if I'm good enough I'll make one of those crooked muthafuckas choke choke choke I forgot why I was alive I'm nothing now except afraid to die But why do I live if life has nothing else to give but fear Is the end near?
2.
In Ohio 05:21
I say I wanna live oh You say you wanna die no Its not worth goin on you say o why o On the street no one says hi The world wants me to go away and die in ohio It says I'm bad- it don't care if I'm always sad already Why's everyone just so mad at me My little ol life no it aint a party like you tell me that it is I don't feel good this is the biz If you want to know why I've killed you If you want to know why I'm hanging here If you want to know why I'm banging If you want to know why I'm not afraid of dying I say I wanna live oh You say you wanna die no Its not worth goin on you say o why o on the street no one says hi the world wants me to go away and die in Ohio Fall asleep with a needle in your arm The only hug you ever got it made you feel warm Slowly your dying just another one The ones who cry got tired of crying you know in OHIO Dying in the streets Dying on a park bench oh oh oh Don't matter where you go Gonna find this death of despair just like IN OHIO If you want to know why I've killed you If you want to know why I'm hanging here If you want to know why I'm banging If you want to know why I'm not afraid of dying Screens flicker words flash they want chall to forget how to do math they want you all dumb as fuck and hooked on hash they want yall to love nothing except cash ahd shiny things they want chall to kill a man over a ring or maybe some words on a post So stop listening to all these fuckin idiots Do what you think Nobodies gonna save you You gotta save yourself So become a muthafuckin superhero My only superhero is me when I don't give a fuck what you say you're so weak My only superhero is me when you took it all away but I'm still standing My only superhero is me when my hate it burns away everything I don't need My only superhero is me when my blood boils over and turns to gasoline
3.
Dead walkin 05:16
everyone is dead with letters in they heads wondering where life is now how can this be everyone in fear with plastic in they ears wondering where life is now how can this be everyone has plans with smartphone on they hands wondering where life is now how can this be does it exist with or without me how can it be that no one can see me or hear me they only fear me because of they tv they dead they head bled fear monetized the bullshit spew never scrutinized so i cant sympathize with the walking dead Walking dead they all around these streets They say hey I love retarded feats Walking dead they all around yo house they want to kill you and your mouse Walking dead they like to be a slave They say I want to be locked up to keep me safe Walking dead they say these words can kill me Please keep me safe please come on please pill me Walking dead they want to ban my speech They say its dangerous to disagree I've seen a lot of stupid things in my years I've seen a lot of stupid things people done outta fear I've seen a alot of stupid things but this takes the beer aint havin a cake cause this fucking stupid shit gives me the worst muthafuckin headache no one really knows what the future holds So when someone tells you they do you know they are Assholes
4.
5.
I lost it all waiting for the call Waiting for the answer that never came Now it just rains all on my face No one knows I'm crying just go on my way This is the world this is the way Everyone pretends like they happy hey Always smiling lying through their teeth They Bleached so white they blinding me but I'm not fooled You're all just tools in a shitty world that aint even coo this is the lame ass future and it does come bricked this is the lame ass future now yall yellin get me out of this muthafuckin bullshit! You said you wanted the future but you didn't want this You said you wanted everything new and everything muthafuckin plastic yeah You said you wanted the future but you didn't want this shit You said you wanted everything new and everything plastic but you didn't want this bullshit I'm so alone I'm so alone Oh help me where is my phone? I lost it all listenin to that to song It told me too bet it all Buy all things have all the rings Buy everyone buy everything Buy plastic dolls in plastic malls From plastic people starin at they phone but I'm not fooled Your all just tools in a shitty future that aint even coo this is the lame ass future and it does come bricked this is the lame ass future now yall yellin get me out of this muthafuckin bullshit! You said you wanted the future but you didn't want this You said you wanted everything new and everything muthafuckin plastic yeah You said you wanted the future but you didn't want this shit You said you wanted everything new and everything plastic but you didn't want this bullshit
6.
DumDumDum 02:48
They say you came up just to be thrown down they say you cannot do anything but flail on the muthafuckin ground they say they say everything they say on screens please be afraid just don't be mean to me I never listen to the screens when they tell me to be afraid If I did that shit I would never be paid bitch I never listen to the screens when they tell me to hate If I did that shit I'd be a miserable fuck sittin in a truck for death I wait I wait till they say its ok I died in here so I don't die out there Cause out there is bad out there is sad in here I'm glad I'm safe to die im safe to die no one will cry for me Laments are not for the cowardly huh Dumbasses yeah yeah yeah yeah Dumbasses yeah yeah yeah yeah Slow ass muthafuckin molasses These dumbasses in 50 years they'll be like I fucked up kids
7.
ay rendered myself dead inside my head To see what it look like and if the kids were really alright ay rendered myself with a knife made of strife I could only see my hope with a flash light it was there but it might not make it through the night I quite do not enjoy this so imma ball my fist and raise the flag like an omen to my ill wishers Muthafucka inside yo mind I see the fissures Like a company in Missouri Misery falls down on yo head if you hear me raise the flag yeh raise the flag yeh raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like this shit then nod yo muthafuckin head breaw raise the flag and burn the dead Its ringin in my head raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead dead now I got that shit ringin in my head ay Fuck your world I never liked it anyway You hated me because I wouldn't see it your way or be gay Just fuck em all M dot is what you say to me Grab the money and run who cares about the decency Or excellence just be greedy fuck the needy Nah I'm takin hacksaws to your bones I'll make this shit without you cause you don't even know me holmes Or where I'm from or what I been through Every single soft muthafucka like you with your dead fish hand shakes need to know imma earthquake Growin in power shakin you down won't be satisfied till yall 6 feet under the ground I'll leave a mound of wreck on yer unmarked grave cause you treated us like slaves With all the fucks that you gave none never needed a gun cause I got the power of my mind son My imagination allows my emancipation from you and your sick muthafuckin head So fuck yall go die we'll raise the flag and burn the dead Yeah ay We raisin the flag and burnin the dead yaw We raisin the flag and burnin the dead yaw yaw yaw we gonna raise the flag and burn the muthafuckin dead yeah It aint a party until people get torched on the streets by giant robots Just like in my dreams I can hear they screams makes me smile like yeh those dudes is my team yeah I'm making robots to rule the world yeah yeah yeah Everybodies dead and I don't give a fuck cause I'm more interested in the ones that live in my head yeah raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like this shit then nod yo muthafuckin head breaw raise the flag and burn the dead Its ringin in my head raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead yaw You like that shit then nod yo muthafuckin head braw raise the flag and burn the dead dead now I got that shit ringin in my head ay
8.
Some people say a man is made outta mud a poor man's made outta muscle and blood muscle and blood and skin and bones a mind that's a-weak and a back that's strong you load sixteen tons, what do you get? another day older and deeper in debt saint peter don't you call me 'cause i can't go i owe my soul to the company store I was born one mornin' when the sun didn't shine i picked up my shovel and i walked to the mine i loaded sixteen tons of number nine coal and the straw boss said "well, a-bless my soul" you load sixteen tons, what do you get? another day older and deeper in debt saint peter don't you call me 'cause i can't go i owe my soul to the company store I was born one mornin', it was drizzlin' rain fightin' and trouble are my middle name i was raised in the canebrake* by an ol' mama lion cain't no-a high-toned woman make me walk the line you load sixteen tons, what do you get? another day older and deeper in debt saint peter don't you call me 'cause i can't go i owe my soul to the company store If you see me comin', better step aside a lotta men didn't, a lotta men died one fist of iron, the other of steel if the right one don't a-get you, then the left one will you load sixteen tons, what do you get? another day older and deeper in debt saint peter don't you call me 'cause i can't go i owe my soul to the company store
9.
Freedumb 02:44
10.
S.O.S. 05:33
Alone at your desk alone in the dark alone alone alone Can't see yer face cause yer masked and 6 feet apart woe Depressions not depressed Oppressions not depressed Smith and Wessons right and left bang Bang its all over Why did you this kill guy Why Did you kill this girl Why Did you kill the chile Cause you were afraid of havin symptoms kinda mild? What is this Symptoms of stupidity No one thinks for themselves they just watch TV swallowin hook line and sinker I know its bullshit cause I'm a free thinker Symptoms of stupidity no one thinks for themselves cause they got a phone talkin heads on there told them to be alone This shit is stupid--- While the world crumbled I made this song this song yeh While the world was shittin their pants I was like whats wrong TV told you to be afraid yeah I don't watch that shit yeah so I got it made woo Alone in your home Looking at faces on a screen and yer heart turns to stone Alone on the street face gleams in the glow of a screen Little icons and fun sounds make you feel like you mean Something to someone While they monetize your life away What now yer gay cause they algorithms modeled you to be that way Symptoms of stupidity No one thinks for themselves they just watch TV and swallowin hook line and sinker I know its bullshit cause I'm a free thinker Symptoms of stupidity no one thinks for themselves cause they got a phone And the talkin heads on there told them to be alone This shit is stupid While the world crumbled I made this song this song yeh While the world was shittin their pants I was like whats wrong wha? TV told you to be afraid yeah I don't watch that shit yeah so I got it made woo While the world crumbled I made this song yeh While the world was shittin their pants I was like whats wrong wha? Talkin heads on yer phone told you to be afraid I don't have a fuckin phone so yeah this muthafucka got it made yeah woo
11.
I know trouble its like when I walk I start to grow it Every footstep I take seems to forsake me it pushin me to blow it I know trouble its like when I rock I start to flow it Every word spit seems to push me futher from a place thats lit Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it I know trouble its like when I talk I start to blow it Every word he said she said makes me wish I was dead Cause this bullshits blowin up my head Ay they you gotta go I know trouble its like when I talk I start to blow it Every word spit seems to push me futher from a place thats lit Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it Ay they say thats it

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ALBUM IN PROGRESS- I'm adding tracks as I make them so if you like this shit keep checking back till the album has 11 tracks-

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released August 23, 2020

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M dot Strange San Jose

Making everything stranger.

Filmmaker, Animator, Game Developer, Musician, Artist, Author,

Has a bike.

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